I’ve been reminded of my mortality more than usual this month. Bernie Mac ,the comedian, died from pneumonia. He was only 50. Rep. Stephanie Tubbs Jones died suddenly of an aneurysm at age 58 which brought back memories of my own sister who died from the same thing at the young age of 26. And yesterday I read that one of my favorite teachers from community college died in a plane crash. He was only 57 and had retired last year. Thinking about death makes me re-analyse my goals to make sure I'm not giving up too much now for a reward later that might never happen. I do think my goals are worth the effort even though I might die or someone I love might die. I can’t control death. It strikes the rich and poor alike. Even if I quit my job today and moved closer to my family it wouldn't guarantee that I would be happy and that no one would die.
I think I just miss my family right now. I visited them in May but it has been 3 months. I used to visit them in September when I had more vacation time. This is why I want a more flexible schedule. I know I wouldn’t want to move up there without at least my minimum budget covered by my rental income. I would be unhappy, I wouldn’t have enough money to live independently and we would start to get on each other’s nerves. What is worse- missing your family or fighting with your family? I would say fighting is much worse. I’ll visit them for Thanksgiving. We’ll have fun. They’ll drive me crazy and I will go back to my life for another 6 months when I will miss them a whole bunch again. (All I really need to do is remember back to last year's Christmas stomach flu episode and I suddenly don't miss them so much!)
Next year I think we might all be getting together for a graduation so I might even see them 3 times. Then it will only be a short time before my mortgage is paid off and I will be free to visit them whenever I want.
5 comments:
That is certainly something we need to consider. I have been thinking about that a lot also, recently. When searching Your Money or Your Life, the other day, I read that Joe Dominguez had died in like 1997.
Your sister was so young. I think I haven't appreciated enough, my good health all of these years.
Once you figure out your passion, maybe you will find that you can do it on the road, and so will be able to visit with your family for longer time periods.
I'm sorry about your sister ff, that must of been awful for you and your family.
on the other stuff, as long as you think your goals are worth the effort now, then that's what matters.
anonymous and Move to Portugal, thanks for the encouragement. Being able to visit family is my main motivation. I have been blessed with good health too but I realise any accident or illness could derail my plan and then I will have wished I had visited them more now. The problem is I would have to take leave without pay and anger the boss. My 2-3 year plan seems short until someone dies. There is no turning back the clock.
Sometime we have to weigh the difference between the benefits of carpe diem (seizing the day) and deferred gratification - As with many things, it's a matter of balance. Don't become an upright frugal miser, that's not the point!
But so sorry for your loss... we are worrying about how to see my husband's family - thousands of mi. away - more often.
Hi Pam, it is hard for me to find a balance especially since most of my family and good friends live so far away. Maybe I should buy everyone a webcam so we can see eachother more. Ok, it's not quite the same as being there.
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